Stepford Wives<---Yes, I am going to go there, again. I love that movie--well, I like the concept of it. I love to dress pretty, have a pretty home and make wonderful, yummy food. I love to be a good wife to a good husband. I love to be a loving mother to my babies. As Dr. Laura would want you to say--I am my husband's girlfriend and my children's mother. Have you heard that before? Are you your husband's girlfriend? Are you your children's Mother?
Women need to stop wearing sweats and t-shirts and start dressing like a lady--brush there hair, wear a little perfume, smell like a girl. Act like you are a woman. Do not act the way you think a man would act if he was a woman-Be a lady--Talk like a lady, look like a lady.
Embrace your duties that are yours--learn how to cook and bake. Know how to bowl water along with getting that spot out of your husbands favorite shirt. Know what his favorite drink is and have it ready for him when he comes home. Leave the men jobs to the men. Women can have babies and nurse them--embrace this.
God picked you to be a woman, because he knew you could do it--he does not make mistakes so don't try and be something you are not-- I am a woman, I enjoy every aspect of being a girl--and I mean everything.
Have a lovely day and remember if at first you don't want to--PRETEND--and then after awhile you won't be pretending, you will be happy!
Please, be nice to your husband, it is not easy being a man:)
Women Rock!
Women need to stop wearing sweats and t-shirts and start dressing like a lady--brush there hair, wear a little perfume, smell like a girl. Act like you are a woman. Do not act the way you think a man would act if he was a woman-Be a lady--Talk like a lady, look like a lady.
Embrace your duties that are yours--learn how to cook and bake. Know how to bowl water along with getting that spot out of your husbands favorite shirt. Know what his favorite drink is and have it ready for him when he comes home. Leave the men jobs to the men. Women can have babies and nurse them--embrace this.
God picked you to be a woman, because he knew you could do it--he does not make mistakes so don't try and be something you are not-- I am a woman, I enjoy every aspect of being a girl--and I mean everything.
Have a lovely day and remember if at first you don't want to--PRETEND--and then after awhile you won't be pretending, you will be happy!
Please, be nice to your husband, it is not easy being a man:)
Women Rock!
26 comments:
Your right about it not being easy to be a man, or a woman nowadays for that matter. But I think what defines you as a man or a woman varies from person to person. We have so many choices now and I think its important to support one another in those choices. Even if they don't quite jibe with our own! ;)
We'll just have to agree to disagree about the Stepford Wife concept. I couldn't anymore do that than I could take wing and fly. It isn't me and never has been.
We all have to be what we are. God made us all different and to deny that difference isn't right either.
I totally understand, and repsect your comments. We can totally agree to disagree:)
Believe me when I say---I know a lot of people do not agree with me.....and that is okay...I just felt the need to express what was on my mind--and this was on my mind...LOL.
Have a great day! Thanks so much for leaving me a comment too--I do so enjoy feedback.
Julieann
It's interesting that you posted this today because it's my day off work. I work in a bank so I either have on a skirt and jacket, or a sweater set and pants, and stockings and dressy shoes. Today however, since I'm cleaning and doing laundry and baking, I'm wearing sweats, a tank top and tennis shoes. My husband is asleep as he works the night shift and my 3 daughters are in school. And while these are the circumstances of my life, and I do work outside the home out of financial need, and I didn't choose to breastfeed my children, I am still a woman, and a Lady and the keeper of my home and a child of God. Not trying to argue with you, just expressing what's on my mind.
Julieann I just love love love your posts. I adore everything you always say and totally agree with everything. I love being a woman and taking care of my wonderful husband and children. I am blessed and know it everyday. I love every single thing I do. Cleaning, baking, gardening, every single thing. I would never have to pretend that is for sure. I am doing what I have always wanted to do. Thank you God!!!
happy day Julieann
deezie
anonymous---While these are the circumstances of your life--you are chosing to do it with grace ---you wrote this comment so nicely--it made me want to come over and help you with the laundry. Granted, I am talking about certain women that I see day in and day out with sweats and they just appear to not care--I have talked with a few of these women, and I know this one in particualr just could care less, and she uses a lot or our convo to tell me such horrid things about her hubby--it is sad. I have totally put on cleaning clothes to scrub the shower--but I don't leave them on all day KWIM?
Anyway, thank you for such a heartfelt comment!
Julieann
Julieann,
I LOVED this post! Especially the part about pretending if you don't feel like it. It's so true that duty is a pretty good substitute for love, and if we just get started, pretty soon we're happy to be where we are.
I love being a feminine woman. And you know, my daughter's fiance has commented many times that he loves seeing her in an apron and cooking in the kitchen. His little remarks make her so happy to be serving him.
You are definitely an inspiration to women.
I love to dress up and even wear my heels. In fact previous to my youngest being born, everyone knew I would always be the one wearing a dress no matter what were were doing.
Unfortunatley a lot of my day it's become not practical in the cold new england weather. I like us to walk a lot on errands, it's healthy and economical and in a dress with the wind blowing is not very lady like for me. It is a battle to keep the dress form doing a Marilyn Monroe.
Changing isn't always the option due to lack of time.
Although I agree with you, it's just become less of an option to dress like a "lady" (i.e dresses)
etc.
I love that you are solid in your views. And don't only talk it, but live it.
Thank you for sharing
For the record. I love to cook and clean and tend home. Although I know a lot of women who don't like it. Now all we need is 36 hours a day instead of just 24. :)
Love love love this post. It says what is in my heart. Thank you so much for posting this.
I love being a lady, wife and mother and embrace all these things. Thanks again!
I don't mind the sweats too much if they are clean, wrinkle and stain free, are coordinated (or go together)and fit you. It is the sloppiness that gets me. I find that I don't feel motivated unless I have had a shower and am dressed nicely...even if it is just jeans and a sweatshirt they are tidy, go together and my socks and barrettes coordinate too. If my husband would let me I'd have matching slippers too :)
Thanks for sharing this Julieann.
It is such a blessing to be able to take care of my DH. I am so blessed to have a husband that appreciates the work I do around the house and for him.
It is fun to be dressed up instead of always being in tennis shoes and a t-shirt. it makes me feel feminine and kind of like I am in an episode of "I Love Lucy"when I actually look nice while doing my daily activities.
Have a great day!
~Charree
I love that movie just because of the hair and clothes. I also like Dr. Laura's book!
I try hard to dress both comfortable, and good looking for my hubby on my days off. I love my ripped up jeans, and so does he.
I agree with you to some extent,but when my dear justin is sitting on the back prch drinking and wants another drink made for him, I would respond nicer to his request if he opened the door and verbally asked me to make another instead he taps on the window and raises his glass and shakes it. thats my cue to make another. i think that is rude of him. I think the respect should be equal and if I'm tired and need something he should want to get it:) He was very helpful I must say when I had surgery last January.
Julieann-
I was just catching up with some blogs I like to read and read this post and it spoke to me and I thought you would like it. It talks about being content at home doing what we do best. Here is the link.
Let me know what you think.
http://redwelliesrainbowsandcinnamonwhirls.blogspot.com/2008/11/content-at-home.html
I work hard for what I have...I have accomplished much. I will not wait on my husband, I dont expect him to wait on me. I did not nurse my children, they are all fine young adults..
Your post is Stepfordwifeish....that is fine for you....not for me.
I will not wait on a man, I dont expect a man to wait on me....I dont have to pretend....I am woman hear me roar!!!!
I like to think of the concept of the Stepford Wife as being a contrast in extremes. One extreme doesn't care about home/family or at least cares less than their spouse would like, for whatever reason, the other is obsessed with it. Neither is healthy or practical.
The trick is to find the balance thats right for you. If your a SAHM and happy like that, I fully support your choice. If your a career woman, I support that too. There's so much fulfillment to be gained from both roles.
But the facts are that most women combine a bit of both. Much of this is simple economic necessity. I know a number of women who have had to return to work after being SAHMs and they feel family life suffers for it. But bills need to be paid and in these tough times, its all hands to the pumps, as my grandmother used to say.
I feel blessed that we are no longer confined to roles dictated to us by Society. We are free to fulfil our potential and find our own level.
See Ali--I am going to agree to disagree with you. I fully believe that the reason families are suffering, etc is because we are not fullfilling are God given roles--women are the nuturers, we need to be home taking care of our families--I completely understand the need for some to work--believe me I do--but I know a lot of women are very materialistic and put themselves first. I truly believe that once we start having children, we are no longer first our babies are.
Anyway, I really liked hearing all your opinions---I know the way I think is not the norm--and believe me I understand that pretty much just a handfull of women will agree with me, and that is okay.
Julieann
Julianne:
I think as long you not only believe in your convictions you live it with a smile says a lot.
I always say I am defnatley not the mainstream as far as my beliefs.
Not a bad thing necessarily
Ok...gotta disagree with ya on this one! My husband would TOTALLY think I was having an affair if he came home and I had on a dress, full makeup, smelled great and a drink in hand for him. That just isn't us! I do stay home, I do take care of the family and the house, I do wait on him SOMEtimes but I do it in my jeans, my sweats,capris, shorts or whatever I happen to have on. I nursed one of 2 children, but they are both perfectly happy humans and you can't tell which one sucked from latex by looking at them. :) The great thing about America is there are all kinds of varities of families and whatever works for you...keep it! Some work, some don't, some wear dresses, some are slobs, some wear cute Victoria's Secret sweats, some wear Walmart ones, some smell good, some don't, some complain, some don't,....as long as the family is happy and the children are taking care of there isn't a problem. I wish it were so easy to blame all the ills in the world and families on the women not wearing dresses and waiting on their husands, but IMO it's not the problem.
Enjoying reading everyone's thoughts on this subject. If I may, I would like to close off my participation in it with a favourite quote of mine from the German poet R.M. Rilke;
"The deepest experience of the creator is feminine, for it is the experience of receiving and bearing"
Have a fab weekend everyone!
Anonymous, I enjoyed your comment--Thank you---I can always learn from other's. ..and I think you also know that I did not mean the downfall of families is because of women not wearing dresses, it does go a lot deeper then that. Your latex comment made me laugh out loud. :o)
Maria, ---Thank you too, for always supporting me too.
Ali--GREAT QUOTE!!!
I also wanted to say about Angie's comment--I agree about what you said about neat and tidy--I agree--I think a cute pair of Clean (maybe pink:) track pants with a cute top is adorable--I think when I say sweats and a t-shirt you all get the jist of what I mean--I am basically saying being unkept--not looking your best, kwim?
Great points everyone.
Thank you all for your cooments. ..and let me say, that the post I wrote was on my mind--it was/is the way I think, pretty much I have always been this way--Maria, a commenter above has known me through the internet for about 8 or 9 years and I think she can vouch and say my views have pretty much always been the same. I did not write this post to hurt any of my blogging friends, believe me I am very good at putting foot in mouth--I just very strongly beleive in old fashoined values--women staying home and men going to work--and yes, there are always exceptions to every rule.
Thank you for taking the time to read what I had to say.
Julieann
AMEN to all you said! i also understand what these women who disagree with you are saying but i really believe they are missing out on God's best.
great writing!!
I get what you mean, Julieann. I don't think you were saying it's wrong to wear sweats & tees all day long, but I'm sure you were more talking about being unkempt & sloppy. I know one thing...I can tell my husband really appreciates when I take the time and the effort to look (and smell) nice for him when he gets home from work. I can see it in the way his eyes light up. He doesn't even have to say anything, but I know that he appreciates that I took the time and the effort to do that for him. Imagine how a husband would feel to be surrounded by well-dressed, sweet smelling women all day at the office, and then having to come home to a tired looking wife. It doesn't take but 5 minutes to quickly run the brush through your hair, spritz on some perfume and wash your mouth out with Listerine or something before your hubby gets home. He deserves that!
Hey, I work outside of the home all day out of necessity and when I get home I cook, clean, help kids with homework and still find time to make myself look pretty for dh when he gets home. I've been doing this for 14 yrs. now. It's not an impossible task. My desire is to please God, my husband and my children and I embrace those privileges.
Wonderful post!
Awesome Post!
Kathi
I love the movie Stepford Wives because of the beautiful town, homes and of course the clothes and their darling kitchens, but I was so glad when I learned that Nicole Kidman's hubby couldn't do it, he love her for HER, not her beautiful body, blond hair, etc. He loved her mind. He loved it that she did argue with him and bring out the best in him. I think women today are very lucky because we have options and we do get to do a little of everything. I have done all kinds of things, I was a stay at home mom for 14 years, about five of those years I worked part-time out of my home doing medical transcription, I worked full time in the beggining of our marriage and after baby #1 came along, then I worked part time with #2. Now I am working part time out side the home. I was really longing to be a full time housewife again, but when I had my two week vacation a few weeks ago, I realized that not only do we need the money and the benefits I receieve from my job, working part time is good for my soul and good for me to keep things in perspective. I think I work harder at home on my days off.
I try very hard to look good for my hubby all the time, but I don't wear very many dresses. I do cook great meals, keep the house clean and make his lunch and coffee every day. We figured out what works for us. The main thing is that God is the center of our home!
I have a happy hubby and happy children!
Hugs, Sharon
I loved this post Juliean. well said. I do so hope that other women will try to be more like this.
Love & Prayers,
Ronda
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